The Office (short-game championship)

WITH few light hours in these dreary winter days, there is little scope for the NCG team to venture onto the links. Contrary to popular opinion, magazines and websites aren't all that easy to put together you know.
So with few opportunities to get the competitive juices flowing we've resorted to putting at risk thousands of pounds worth of computer equipment by staging chipping and putting contests.
The inventor of the course, a strip of carpet between the editorial and design sections of a large open-plan office, is unknown. What is certain, though, is the addictive quality of this ad hoc short-game facility.
Quite what the inhabitants of the office below think is going on I'm not quite sure. A dull thud followed by what sounds like one of the Dam Busters bouncing balls - I wonder if they've worked it out?
Assuming no harm comes to the Apple Macs and PCs which line the fairway, it will prove a successful operation though and not only because it provides a bit of fun in the otherwise dark winter months.
It is also actually terrific practice. If you can produce a clean strike off that worn carpet you'll be confident of chipping off even the tightest of links lies come March.
What's more, there's no disguising the purity of a strike. A slightly fat effort if clearly audible while anything thin simply careers into the back wall.
There's already evidence to suggest that one staff writer whose short game is on the inconsistent side is likely to be deadly round the greens next season. Indeed, the official NCG Handicap Committee have already met on two occasions to discuss a suitable adjustment.
The worrying thing for this author is that while my chipping is respectable enough, my putting can only be ranked in the bottom three of NCG staff.
When you consider there are six of seven staff who don't actually play the game, it's a worrying stat. I'm not even learning my lessons either. One evening I spent 15 minutes or so hitting the same putt so clumsily that it sped past its target (a clever device from Putt 360) and into the kitchen time after time after time to the bemusement and delight of the Editor.
At least now I know how Tiger felt when he putted into Rae's Creek at Augusta. Sort of.
By Chris Bertram